Something’s been eating at me for a while now. One day, a few weeks back, I was talking with a friend. She was telling me her good news–she and her husband’s dream house just went on the market, and they decided to purchase it. I could tell how excited she was, and I was happy for her too. Every time my friend drove past this house before it was for sale, she’d tell her husband it was the house she always wanted. Now her dream of owning that house had come true. I hugged her and congratulated her. She whispered to me, “Just don’t tell B_______. She will be mad that I’m moving out of our neighborhood and into a bigger house.”
Seriously? She won’t tell our other friend and she won’t share her excitement because she might get mad? It sounds crazy. But, you know what? I bet a lot of us have been in her shoes, where we keep our successes or our excitement to ourselves because of the haters. I have too, and it took me a long time to get to a point where I let myself be happy for my successes and my family’s.
Eric and I live in a wonderful neighborhood and have a really great house. It’s unfortunate that instead of some family and friends being happy for us, they would make comments like, “You’re one of the ones that live in “The Enclave” (the custom/estate section of our neighborhood). Yep, we are, and we love it. “Do you really need such a big house. What, did you add a sun room just for the cats?’ Actually, we love the space our house provides our family, and we all use and love the sun room, including the cats.
“Look at you, the blogger. Do you actually think people read it?” (Seriously, someone has said that to me!) Why yes, I am a blogger now. I have always loved to write, and this was the perfect way for me to continue to do so. Do I have a ton of followers? Not yet. Do I care? Not really. I’m just glad to have an outlet to do what I love and share my writing, my experiences, and my thoughts.
Yes, I drive a Range Rover. It had been a car I’d always dreamed of, but never expected to own. One year, as a Christmas present, Eric surprised me with a new car–my dream car. Do I love it? Of course I do! Do others hate it? Sure. But I’ve gotten to the point that it doesn’t matter what others want to think or say. We can afford it, Eric wanted to give it to me as a gift, and I absolutely love it!
Yes, the house, the car, clothes, vacations…they are all material things. They are nice, but they aren’t what provides me happiness–my friends and family do. I’d be fine with a smaller home if we needed to downsize. I’d give up the Range Rover for something else if need be. And I’d be fine. Even though we all have some haters, I do have some amazing friends, and I have great kids and a wonderful husband who bring me more joy and love than anything/anyone.
The truth: Haters are gonna hate. They are going to dislike you for what you have, where you travel to, for your happy family life, for your successes. There’s always going to be someone who won’t be happy for you or will have rude comments to make about you.
My advice: Just move on. You know what you and your family want or need. You might have worked hard for lots of years to get where you are. Enjoy it! Enjoy life. Do what you love, and don’t let the voices of those haters ruin your happiness.