I’m going to be 46 in a few months, and I’m pretty sure I’m going through a mid-life crisis.
It’s pretty awesome. Actually…it rocks! I’m loving all of it and how it’s making me feel.
It all started last month when a friend of mine invited me to go zip lining with her. As I waited my turn, my heart was fluttering, I was super-chatty with the zip line dude, and I was scared. But when it was time for me to push off of the ledge and I began to soar way over the trees, I started to chill. It was such an amazing feeling to be floating quietly along, watching all the people and landscape below me. I felt like a badass. I liked it.
When another guide suggested my friend and I jump from the 100-foot drop, I was all in (so was my friend–who is also a badass). The guide counted down, and when he got to one, I was told to just walk off the platform and allow myself to fall down the 100 feet. This time, I wasn’t really nervous at all. I figured, why not do this? Seriously, I’m only going to live this one life. And I want to live a full, adventurous life. I want to take chances, make changes without fear, and live a real life.
A friend of mine is a life coach, and her motto is “scared but doing it anyway”. That’s exactly what I decided to do as I walked off the platform–I threw scared out the window and I did it anyway. ‘m so glad I did. It was the most amazing feeling! I can’t wait to do it all again.
That day of outdoor adventures kept me on my “take chances, make changes, no fear” mantra.
I started working on a novel. This is big–I’ve thought about writing a book since I was a little girl. I’ve been way too chicken and not confident enough to actually try to do it. I’m only in the outlining stage, but I’m excited to be making time for something I’m eager to do. Sure, no one might read it and it might never ever get published, or it could be a big hit. Either would be scary, but I’m going for it anyway. If I don’t do it now, when will I? No fear. Take chances. No regrets.
I’m also thinking of getting a tattoo. All my life, I’ve been against getting a tattoo. Why would I want to be in my 80’s or 90’s and have something permanent stuck to my sagging, old body? As the years go by, however, there are some words and symbols that signify what I live for and what I believe in. Using a part of my body as art to always serve as a reminder of what I stand for in some way has become more and more interesting to me. Currently, I have a temporary tattoo stuck to my forearm so I can see if I really am ready for some ink. The tattoo says, “believe”. To me, this word speaks volumes. Believe in yourself. Believe you can do anything. Believe in others. Believe in family. Believe it can happen.
My other mid-life change? I changed my hair. Way more than usual. I was growing it into a bob down to my shoulders. It was very conservative. Yesterday, I decided to just go for it and have it cut very differently. I had it dyed a dark brown, had a bunch of funky layers chopped into it, and I left the salon with a new attitude and a new haircut. To me, it’s cool. It’s crazier than usual. I don’t have a “mom haircut” anymore. I also know this: It’s just hair. And if I change my mind about it, I can change it again. It’ll grow back, and it can be cut. Making changes–I’m doing it.
Hello, mid-life crisis. Welcome! I’m ready to try more new things that I’ve been afraid of or nervous about in the past. Sure, changes are a little scary, but I’m going to just go for it anyway. And I can’t begin to tell you how strong and empowered I’m feeling these days!
It’s awesome 🙂